Stage three.
Such a small phrase
For something that shakes a family to its bones.

The room grew colder when the words were said.
And suddenly every moment
Became something we wanted to hold forever.

לָמָה אֱלֹקִים זָנַחְתָּ לָנֶצַח¹

*Lamah Elokim z'nachta lanetzach.*

[Why, O God, have You rejected us forever?]

Why does it feel
Like the world keeps moving
While ours stood still?

רְפָאֵנוּ ה׳ וְנֵרָפֵא הוֹשִׁיעֵנוּ וְנִוָּשֵׁעָה²

*Refa'einu Hashem v'nerafeh, hoshi'einu v'nivashe'ah.*

[Heal us, Hashem, and we shall be healed; save us, and we shall be saved.]

We do not know
If this is only a reminder of the timer
Or the timer itself.

And all the nonsense falls away
In the presence of the muzzle.
A smile means more.
A laugh means more.
Holding your hand means more.

זְכֹר עֲדָתְךָ קָנִיתָ קֶּדֶם¹

*Zechor adatcha kanita kedem.*

[Remember Your congregation which You acquired long ago.]

Remember us. Remember him.
Remember the people who need him.

רְפָאֵנוּ ה׳ וְנֵרָפֵא
הוֹשִׁיעֵנוּ וְנִוָּשֵׁעָה כִּי תְהִלָּתֵנוּ אָתָּה
וְהַעֲלֵה רְפוּאָה שְׁלֵמָה לְכָל מַכּוֹתֵינוּ²

*Refa'einu Hashem v'nerafeh, hoshi'einu v'nivashe'ah, ki tehilaseinu atah, v'ha'aleh refuah shleimah l'chol makoseinu.*

[Heal us, Hashem, and we shall be healed; save us, and we shall be saved, for You are our praise. Bring complete healing to all our afflictions.]

And still קאַפּיטל seventy four rises.
The chapter of this year.
Not denying the fear.
Not pretending the pain is small.
But remembering.

וֵאלֹקִים מַלְכִּי מִקֶּדֶם
פֹּעֵל יְשׁוּעוֹת בְּקֶרֶב הָאָרֶץ³

*Ve'Elokim malki mikedem, po'el yeshuot b'kerev ha'aretz.*

[Yet God is my King from of old, working salvation in the midst of the earth.]

The Hashem Who brought light into chaos
Is still here now.

ה׳ רֹעִי לֹא אֶחְסָר
בִּנְאוֹת דֶּשֶׁא יַרְבִּיצֵנִי
עַל מֵי מְנֻחוֹת יְנַהֲלֵנִי
נַפְשִׁי יְשׁוֹבֵב יַנְחֵנִי בְמַעְגְּלֵי צֶדֶק לְמַעַן שְׁמוֹ
גַּם כִּי אֵלֵךְ בְּגֵיא צַלְמָוֶת
לֹא אִירָא רָע כִּי אַתָּה עִמָּדִי⁴

*Hashem ro'i lo echsar. Bin'ot deshe yarbitzeini. Al mei menuchot yenahaleini. Nafshi yeshovev, yancheini b'ma'gelei tzedek l'ma'an sh'mo. Gam ki elech b'gei tzalmavet, lo ira ra ki atah imadi.*

[The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want. He causes me to lie down in green pastures. He leads me beside restful waters. He restores my soul and guides me in paths of righteousness for His name's sake. Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for You are with me.]

And healing begins there.
In refusing to let fear
Have the final word.

Because soon, b'ezras Hashem,
We will sit together again.
We will laugh again.

שִׁבְטְךָ וּמִשְׁעַנְתֶּךָ הֵמָּה יְנַחֲמֻנִי
תַּעֲרֹךְ לְפָנַי שֻׁלְחָן נֶגֶד צֹרְרָי
דִּשַּׁנְתָּ בַשֶּׁמֶן רֹאשִׁי כּוֹסִי רְוָיָה
אַךְ טוֹב וָחֶסֶד יִרְדְּפוּנִי כָּל יְמֵי חַיָּי
וְשַׁבְתִּי בְּבֵית ה׳ לְאֹרֶךְ יָמִים⁴

*Shivtecha umish'antecha heimah yenachamuni. Ta'aroch lefanai shulchan neged tzorerai. Dishanta vashemen roshi, kosi revayah. Ach tov vachesed yirdefuni kol yemei chayai. V'shavti b'veit Hashem l'orech yamim.*

[Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me. You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies. You anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows. Surely goodness and kindness shall pursue me all the days of my life, and I shall dwell in the House of Hashem for length of days.]

רְפָאֵנוּ ה׳ וְנֵרָפֵא
הוֹשִׁיעֵנוּ וְנִוָּשֵׁעָה
כִּי תְהִלָּתֵנוּ אָתָּה
וְהַעֲלֵה רְפוּאָה שְׁלֵמָה לְכָל מַכּוֹתֵינוּ
כִּי קֵל מֶלֶךְ רוֹפֵא נֶאֱמָן וְרַחֲמָן אָתָּה²

*Refa'einu Hashem v'nerafeh. Hoshi'einu v'nivashe'ah. Ki tehilaseinu atah. V'ha'aleh refuah shleimah l'chol makoseinu. Ki Kel Melech rofei ne'eman v'rachaman atah.*

[Heal us, Hashem, and we shall be healed. Save us, and we shall be saved. For You are our praise. Bring complete healing to all our afflictions. For You are God, King, faithful and compassionate Healer.]

בָּרוּךְ רוֹפֵא חוֹלֵי עַמּוֹ יִשְׂרָאֵל
בָּרוּךְ רוֹפֵא חוֹלֵי עַמּוֹ יִשְׂרָאֵל²

*Baruch rofei cholei amo Yisrael. Baruch rofei cholei amo Yisrael.*

[Blessed is the Healer of the sick of His people Israel. Blessed is the Healer of the sick of His people Israel.]

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### Sources

¹ Psalm 74:1–2

² Amidah – Refa'einu Blessing

³ Psalm 74:12

⁴ Psalm 23:1–6